Have you ever experienced that feeling of dread that washes over you when you fail at something? It’s not uncommon. In fact, it’s natural. Our body reacts to all kinds of feelings, and failure is no exception.
When we excel, our brain releases endorphins, dopamine and serotonin to motivate us to do it all over again. And when we fail, cortisol kicks in, triggering our fight-or-flight response.
You’ve probably heard all the motivational quotes, like “Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn,” or “Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.” And as clichéd as they may sound when you’re in the midst of failing, it turns out they’re true.
Studies show everyone who is a winner was once a loser, but not every failure leads to success. The difference lies in how each person responds to failure. Each attempt following a failure must incorporate a change – something that was learned from the failed attempt. A perfect learner understands every failed aspect of an attempt and makes improvements, leading to success. Someone who doesn’t learn from their mistakes at all is forced to start from scratch with every attempt, rarely achieving success – most people naturally land somewhere in between.
Now that we understand the psychology behind it, here are some strategies for keeping failure in check and avoiding loss aversion to become your best self.
1. Be grateful. As part of redefining your relationship with failure, be thankful for everything you have in this moment. This doesn’t mean losing motivation for achieving something greater but rather accepting where you’re at. When you’re grateful, you operate in a mindset of abundance rather than scarcity – and you’re less likely to fear loss.
2. Fail early and often. If we’re bound to fail before we succeed, it’s best to do it earlier in the process, learn from it and try again. Early failure also makes us comfortable with failing and reminds us that it’s just part of the journey.
3. Focus on the long term. In the short term, failure doesn’t feel great. But we should be comfortable making sacrifices upfront in exchange for something greater in the long term. This might mean a few bumps along the way.
4. Take time to reflect. When in the process of trying to achieve something, it’s worth taking the time to reflect on why you’ve missed the mark. If you do your due diligence, you won’t have to start from scratch the next time you give it a go.
5. Be your own cheerleader. Positive self-talk is critical at points of failure. It’s great to have a strong support system to encourage you, but nothing is more powerful than the voice inside your head. Even if you lose, have confidence you’ll learn something and make a better attempt at it next time. Believe it can happen. Pro tip: Visualise yourself accomplishing what you set out to do. This is why professional athletes envision winning before they even start their game.
Bear market of 1974The severe bear market of 1974 threatened the existence of Raymond James, which was bleeding capital by the day. Tom James, his father and other leaders took extreme measures to keep the firm afloat, slashing costs, forgoing pay checks and even attempting to sell the firm for just enough capital to protect client assets and retain as many associates as possible. The story could have ended very differently if not for a sharp upturn and continued rebound in the stock markets late in the year. |
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Black MondayOn 19 October 1987, the stock markets experienced a dramatic plunge that prompted many firms to shut down their trading desks and turn off their phones to minimize internal losses. Raymond James refused to do the same. Our desks stayed open to help meet clients’ needs, resulting in our first and only unprofitable quarter since the firm went public in 1983. |
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Who was Raymond James?The Raymond in our name is actually from Edward Raymond, owner of a 15-employee mutual fund sales group, Raymond and Associates, along Florida’s west coast. He sold his company to Bob James on 15 July 1964, on condition that the surviving firm be called Raymond, James & Associates. Three days after the sale, Ed Raymond was involved in a near-fatal automobile accident and never joined the firm. Nonetheless, even after Raymond had passed away, Bob James insisted that his name remain on the door – ahead of James’ own. That was a promise he made to Ed Raymond three days before the accident, and Bob James was a man who kept his promises. |
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Taking Raymond James PublicWhen consideration was being given to taking Raymond James public, Tom James penned a letter to shareholders (largely employees at the time). ” … the public offering should be considered as a statement of our independence. While this is a psychological rather than an economic rationale, it is nonetheless very important. We have asserted for some time that we are not interested in becoming a small part of a very large corporation. That assertion results mainly from the inclinations of management rather than the economic benefits associated with either alternative. The public stock offering affords us the opportunity to enjoy a little bit of the best of both worlds. While shareholders will be given liquidity at fair market value, we will still have the ability to control our own destiny.” After 40+ years of Tom’s leadership, upon becoming CEO, Paul Reilly was often questioned about whether the company might ultimately surrender its cherished independence and be acquired by some larger entity. His response: “Not while I’m around.” It’s a theme that continues today. |
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